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If you have too much time on your hands, you'll start pondering the totality of your existence; this is not generally a good thing. On the other hand, if you have not enough time on your hands, your existence will sort of fly by without your notice, and this is no better. I had this all better articulated, but it died from the way to the bathroom to the computer, the way dreams die within seconds of waking. Also, I've been drinking too much.

There's a Woody Allen documentary on Netflix; it's well worth watching. He says, at one point, something along the lines of: "Everything a creative person does, everything you create - it's just you deflecting the awful truth that you'll die one day and it'll all be nothing." I probably didn't get that quite right, but I'm sure I got close because the idea resonated with me instantly. The thing is, he keeps making movies. Why? It's like he's become the answer to his own question.

I saw Sarah tonight and it was nice. We paid the rent and put in our notice. How do I feel about life right now? See previous paragraph.

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